By Dean Sprague

Enough about instruments now let’s talk about British wiring, connectors and switches that support them, in theory of course. The folks at Lucas designed a wiring connector and switch that are very special. The connector was intended to be a plug n’ play set up. It plugs in very quickly but over time “playing” is a different issue. They determined that copper was a great conductor of electricity so silver type plating would be even better. This is all true of course if the climate is arid. That means very dry. You know like it is in Great Britain, really! That’s why some say the Brits are developing webfeet. I digress now so let’s go back to wiring. Since the ends of the wire connectors are not sealed the “Gremlins of Corrosion” can do their thing unabated and they do. The connector shortfalls can be addressed in several ways. You could super glue or maybe silicone them together. While this will “seal” them it does somewhat undermine the “plug/unplug” convenience concept. Actually, dielectric grease works really well. Just put a dab in each end before plugging. Although I have actually seen the glue together technique, believe it or don’t.

The Lucas switch is widely known to have three positions, off, dim and flicker. No further discussion required. We won’t begin to discuss the logic employed in British wiring designs. They used the highest quality copper wire but then ran it in the most nonsensical directions to accomplish the simplest of tasks. The good news is they employed the same logic, color patterns and design for almost every car so if you master one you should be able to take a swing at all of them.

Another topic I would like to broach is weather proofing and climate control. My father always said, “The top (hood) on British cars was only intended to keep out hail because of the obvious safety hazards. Protection from any of the other elements was purely by accident”. In fact, if you have ever driven your British car in the rain you may have noticed that “moisture” tends to seep in from most seams and junctions. Other elements can seep in as well. For example, one night while traveling from Maine with my father in his 1959 3000 Healey we hit a snowstorm. When morning finally arrived we couldn’t see out of the rear view mirror. We first thought it was a “whiteout” then realized that the rear jump seat had filled with so much snow that it blocked view from the rear window! True story.

Now let’s talk briefly about the climate control systems, the British heater. Cockpit heaters typically have one of three available settings, off, wishful thinking or wide open, which will deliver third degree-burns to occupants in about 2 minutes. Actually, the heater in a British car is of little value anyway because of the total void of any effective insulation (or protection from) the engine heat. Since the cockpit is located directly behind the engine all occupants are essentially sitting in a sauna bath in a matter of milliseconds anyway, especially during the warmer seasons.

In all seriousness, I defy anyone to find a hobby more fun than just messing with classic cars, especially Little British ones. They are not the computer designed “all look the same” cars of today. Modern cars are highly technical, extremely efficient; vehicles cannot be serviced or repaired without the use of a computer, special umbilical cords, plugs and tons of software. I doubt few will survive ravishes of time to become “collectable” classics. These cars are not intended to last far beyond their available extended warranties. They will be recycled and then probably forgotten.

So now it’s time to dawn our driving caps and gloves, slide into our cockpits and brave the elements. We can relive and enjoy the simple pleasures of an earlier time, a time when individuality in design and execution was valued on its own merit. The focus should be on the fun factor not the other stuff anyway. Remember, man was never in intended to drive boring cars.